Of death, movies and other stuffs...

So, the last time I wrote something here, was a time when Kapil Dev was in polka dotted diapers and dinosaurs used to prance around the earth with gay abandon. Ok, that’s a slight exaggeration about the extent of my absence, but you get the drift.

Absenteeism reasons, though I assume you care more about the dirt stuck under the nail on your left little finger than my absenteeism reasons, range from being busy with a domesticated and less grandiose version of that part of Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Ghum where Bacchan Saab tells SRK that he must not marry Kajol (Oh yeah, now this is the part which makes my female friends go "oh wow! Bata na Bata na ") , to , settling in a job where the best part of my day remains hitting the coffee button on the sputtering machine or discovering the OS on my laptop has crashed or for the matter of fact…even my laptop has crashed this time.

But this being a late weekend night when I rest with a un-full tummy and nothing much on the TV , I think I will talk about something , which is totally unaligned with the kind of person I am . I mean , considering the kind of person I am , the deepest conversation I should be having should be about some animal with a real bad digestion , but I say with the unflinching honesty of a Vinod Kambli on Sach ka Saamna , I am not trying to seem like the next Aristotle here . All I am trying to do is talk rather pointlessly about something which has been hovering in the back alleys of my mind since this morning with the feeble yet significant buzz of a mosquito trapped in your ear canal – Death.

Death, you know. That part of life which ends it. Considering that I have not yet not died though many sensible people have tried to eradicate me , I don’t know how it must be after death , but I do imagine it to be very quiet , relaxed , solitary and chill after death . I am not sure if there is a heaven for the good guys and a hell for the bad guys, and as a result, I am not very concerned about the old woman I pushed off the stairs last week. I mean, you understand how annoying it is to be not being able to rush down the stairs because a 67 year old ahead of you moves slower than a sofa, don’t you? But the fact remains that I am going to die someday, whether it happens when I am digging into a hotdog (I hope I have finished the most of it by that time, mommy says food should not be wasted) or it happens when I am wedged between the rubber tires of a MSRTC bus, whether I am going to be regaled by Arabian dancers in some heaven, or be served as supper to hungry devils in a green tubelight-ed hell.

And you know, what I am thinking about is that moment, that moment which is sitting delicately at the end of the road called life as it ends, yet opens up into the unknown chasm called death. That moment, when I will be on the verge of being lifted by death, and I will know in my heart “Shit yaar, yeh end hai, ab picchar baaki nahi hai mere dost”. Now no “Dawa ya Dua” can save me!! No more people , no more movies , no cars , no boss , no relationships , no money , no smiles , no Himesh Reshammiya , no fights , no competitions , no career , no TV , nothing , after the event called Death.That moment, when I will know in my heart, that irrespective of my willingness to go or not, I would be gone next moment. In that moment, I imagine myself to feel guilty about the heart I broke, happy about the smile I brought on a face, sad about the moment I should have told my mother I loved her but did not, proud of the moment I believed in someone and stood by her, happy about the times I spent laughing with my friends, grateful for the moments somebody knew me as I am and accepted me, heartbroken about being a son lesser than a son I should have been. And just experiencing a little of that moment by writing about it, I am shocked by how easily do I forget what really matters. Kitni choti choti baton par senti ho jaata hoon main!! I mean, how easily I forget that I am going to die and a lot of stuff doesn’t really matter.

How easily do I forget that however blind I may try to be to my reality, that moment will thrust the sum of deeds in my face without leaving me with an escape route?

How easily do I allow myself to lose perspective and be drowned in the useless ego fights , pointlessly hurting the very people I love , choosing not to express my love just because I am too proud to do so , not taking that stupid seeming but heartfelt leap because I never have . How easily I forget the impending arrival of that last moment, and as a result, how easily I forget what really matters during the moments I have between now and that moment. How easily do I let myself be scared by the insecurities of a life unknown and continue to suffer a situation I don’t enjoy when that moment will snatch away whatever fake securities I build around myself. How easily I shut up my heart and listen to all the voices around me, when in the end, the only voice I should be hearing is the voice of my heart. How easily I forget death, and thus, how easily I forget how to live. I mean, sometimes I really need this perspective check and get out of the holed up thinking and view life in a more cool manner. Saala khul ke jeena bhool jaata hoon yaar. I mean, I act like I have a lot to lose and get all scared and calculated, when hai kya mere paas khone ke liye?

I know you are either confused or bored or both and would label the drivel above as some cheap regurgitation of some pocket sized Geeta I recently read. But you know, I am just talking to myself like those bollywood-ish village crack heads who roam around the village mumbling to themselves with their overgrown and uncombed hairstyles and are taunted and stoned by the half naked village urchins.

So chill, don’t walk out of this blog feeling all suicidal and kill yourself by smelling your own feet. Aise he baat kar raha tha kakke. And the movie season kicks in pretty soon now, with Kites already out and also crashed…and Rajneeti, Raavan following soon and I really need to spike up my movie watch counter this weekend. If any of you stays around Mumbai suburb and needs a company over a movie, I am totally in, though don’t think I am running some shady “friendship club” with those heart shaped ads in hindi newspapers. By the way, watched "What’s your Rashee” today, and even though the end is a bit “Hain??” types, the movie did seem pretty delightful and 'feel good' to me. Moral of the story - Harman Baweja is not that bad an actor. I mean, he is a bit wooden, but not exactly teak. Second moral of the story - Just because I noticed Harman does not mean I am not straight!

And so that would be all for the time being before I go back and cook some maggi for me now (Oh yes, it’s 03.48 in the night…ohh sorry early morning…or whatever you want to call this part….and I am really hungry, courtesy the fact that mommy offered me “kal ke raajma and parso ke chawal” for dinner)

Have a great time ahead!!

Happy reading….

DOES EDUCATION HELP US LEAD BETTER LIVES?

‘Education’. What does this term really mean? I am not talking about the literary meaning or dictionary meaning. Life is a great school and our experience teaches us so many things that no formal school or college cannot teach.

Recently I attended a Seminar on Higher Education. The Seminar was organized by a prestigious college in Mumbai and many eminent persons from various walks of life presented papers on the various aspects of higher education like its present status in India, ills of the present system, various report and suggestions, the challenges to be met, foreign players in the field, industry-academics inter-dependence and so on. All the speakers were very good and convinced the participants about their points.

What really caught my serious attention was the comments that just a couple of speakers made – should education limit its goal to making the person employable; is it the duty of the university merely to ensure that the graduates get into good jobs or it extends to transforming an individual to a more empowered, equipped and useful person; is it not the duty of the educators to transform the students to useful members of the humankind?

True. All of us go to colleges to earn our degrees, which will fetch us good jobs. But over the years, colleges have ended doing only this job. Gone are the days when students ‘gained knowledge’, ‘learnt life skills’, ‘became more responsible persons’, ‘became more socially aware’, ‘grew mature to face the challenges of life’ in colleges. It is sad to see the quality of graduates coming out of the colleges. But for a few, most of them are not equipped with social skills or life skills. Let alone the immature students, even many of the parents are not prepared to face defeats. Everybody wants to be only in the cream of the lot! How is it possible? All parents want their wards to be the toppers and all of them want their wards to be only engineers, doctors or IT professionals! Teaching, which is such a noble profession, is hardly given any respect. Only the worst of the graduates enter the academic field as a last resort and they too take up the profession just for the income! How can we expect such teachers to transform individuals, when they themselves are a frustrated lot of losers?

It was saddening to note that many of the leading colleges of Bangalore were on the verge of closure, as they were not getting enough number of students for the regular degree courses! People are shocked when some students passionately take up science studies and remark, ‘but why? Didn’t you get selected in an engineering college?’ Never mind even if the ward gets admitted to the worst of the engineering colleges!

Life skills! Values! Reading rich literature! Learning languages! Community service! All these are becoming strange to today’s generation. How many of today’s students can manage homes, maintain relationships, strengthen them and be successful in their life? The increasing number of divorces, the dwindling family values, the rising number of deserted senior citizens, the increasing number of crimes committed by educated youth, the rising number of suicides by people belonging to the age group of 15-30 are all indicators of where our society is proceeding to.

In fact formal education does little to make the society more mature, responsible and peaceful. The value system that existed in our society ages ago was quite strong. Our parents did not panic when we failed in some subject or did not win a prize in a contest or even if some of us did not want to go to school. As long as we were able to carry on life independently and harmlessly, they had no issues. Nobody requires a degree to lead a successful life. One may not be an achiever in some field. But he can still lead a peaceful and useful life. My grandfather who was just a school pass-out successfully brought up 6 children, who are all leading very good lives. But today, I see how young couples are unable to manage even one kid, depend so much on their parents or others and end up in psychiatric problems.

Of course women have become more empowered, more educated and are more successful in various fields because of education. But on the other side, the society as such is losing many of its strengths and values, which cannot be filled by education. Our teachers taught us to respect our elders, live in harmony with our families and even sacrifice for the sake of our brothers or sisters or parents. But today, self-centered attitude is on the rise. Consumeristic society breeds self-centered individuals, who are more intent upon their personal growth and materialistic possessions rather than the good of the entire society. Capitalism has started being appreciated and adopted by one and all.

‘Survival of the fittest’ is nature’s rule. So, why should I bother? If I am successful, it is because of my own efforts and if someone is begging, it is because of his own making- this is what many feel today! Compassion is hard to find. Even philanthropy is done with some other motive. Children feel their parents are interfering and irritants very soon in their lives! They conveniently forget all the efforts and sacrifices of the parents and proclaim independence, hurting them. While they want to enjoy the support system of the family, they fail to recognize their responsibilities towards protecting the system.

In society, three to four generations used to live under one roof. Children separating from parents after marriage was also seen as a taboo. But today, children are separating from their parents immediately after getting into jobs. I am shocked to hear some youngsters studying in hostels comment, ‘I don’t feel like going home to hear my parents nagging me all the time’ and stay on in a third place even after completion of their studies, while the poor parents keep funding them and waiting eagerly for their return!

The so-called ‘love’ is the only emotion that the youth recognize and they go up to any extent to win their love- even murder! All other relationships –parents, sisters, brothers, cousins, etc. become secondary. Okay! If they glorify love, how come the same partners become unbearable immediately after marriage? Responsibilities are shunned and totally individualistic attitudes only cause rifts in them and they separate very soon in life, without even thinking about the psychological problems that their children will undergo!

Illiterate families living in the remote rural areas live happily. Each person is given his due respect and everybody contributes for the well-being of the family. Children grow in a secure atmosphere and get the love of grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins. Brotherhood and sharing come naturally to them. Just drive to a village and you will find the difference. Farmers who grow our food whole-heartedly and generously give us vegetables, fruits and grains that they grow freely, though they themselves may be living in abject poverty! No college or university taught them those values. Not that there are exceptions on both the sides. I am talking only about the majority!

Education in the real sense has to take on the responsibility of protecting the value system of the society, besides imparting bookish knowledge to the students. Education should teach students life skills. Students should be prepared to face any kind of eventuality in their lives. Life is not rosy at all times. One should be ready to pass through thorns too!

Physically, mentally, psychologically and spiritually stronger individuals should be coming out of our colleges and universities-marks and ranks apart!